It is easy to question someone else’s motives and methods, but you know better what works for you (even if in theory their ways and means seem so much easier than your own). We process information and tasks a little differently than each other. That is a wonderful benefit of not being the exact copy of someone else.
In the last few years, my writing activities and learning came by way of a motivation called fear. I was a sponge, soaking up the advice and questioning myself at every turn. It seemed prudent at that time when I didn’t understand why some events resulted in after shocks. ( i.e. This occurred, which resulted in That happening. The This was just general course of life activities, but the That caught me completely off guard. And That hurt me to the core of my existence.)
The mess I was left with gave me fits for quite a while. Being a writer or as some have pointed out, a storyteller, my first reaction was to question and delve into the motivation of my own actions and reactions as well as trying to imagine the same for everyone else involved. It made for a very convoluted way to live.
However, I persevered and eventually got to here. This new year, with some resolved issues and some just accepted life lessons. I realized how people influence me is a choice that I make. It is important to note this here, on my blog, because I write. Writing is influenced by many aspects, the same can be said about the way the writing is presented.
How different my way of presenting my writing will be in 2016 over all the years previously, I don’t know exactly. My appreciation and validation for my own writing has changed since I began. It was a slow evolution. I still have a long way to go to become the writer of my dreams, but I realize that my efforts, however small to improve, are taking place.
That is no small feat and something to be happy about. First and most important is realizing this is my work. Treating and respecting it as such, and being more professional (yes, that is an arbitrary concept) about my time and efforts means extending that appreciation I have for other’s work to my own. Oh, my gosh, I think I may be finding my lost ego.
Well, how cool is that?
I think it is about time.