First Thing In The A.M.

What do you do in the morning? First thing, but not getting too intimate or nosy.

I journal. Well, to be a little more precise, I drink a cup of coffee and write what ever is on my mind. A habit that was started years and years ago after a catechism lesson with my parish priest. It was the best piece of advice ever. Sometimes I drop out of the habit and when life and distractions get in the way. Eventually, out of frustration and annoyance, I end up going right back to it.

In the beginning of this habit, for a solid couple of years, I added his second tidbit. I read the Bible all the way through. NOTE – I DID NOT READ IT ACCORDING TO ANY PRE-SPECIFIED SCHEDULE. I read the books according to the order in which the general consensus dictates they were written. Other than that it was based on my gut.

Some days it might be a few verses others several chapters, sometimes only a chapter. It depended on the content and my comprehension. Over and over I was amazed at the timing factor of what I was reading and what was or had just happened in my own life or environment. That was nearly thirty years ago.

In recent years, morning readings have been about becoming a cleaner succinct writer, or psychology type material – things to help me develop characters and motivation. Or a more accurate truth — become a better editor of my own words.

All well and good, if respect is held for either or both the material and the author. This morning I forced myself to read a piece of work, that I will not name (because that would be unkind), but find full of bull poop and  believe is written to mask someone else’s work with subterfuge. At least it reads that way to me; my gut screams it. I even tried reading as if I was editing the work, making little scribbles in the margin—”BULL! What? Clarify! TOO WORDY! How does this connect to the point you are trying to make? What is your point?” My head hurt, my mood had darkened and I sat debating whether or not I wanted to waste my entire month with it. My gut said toss it in the trash. After a few minutes I tossed it on the table and starting writing this. Before this very sentence, I had indeed tossed it in the trash.

Amazing! My head ache is gone. My mood is uplifted. No meds taken, no real major change in my person or surrounding, but the sun seems to be shining brighter.

My personal quandary is wondering if my opinion, my decision makes me bad. Am I a captious hypercritic? I don’t know, but I sure feel a lot better than I did before I started writing this.

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